Carry On
by whoamaddie
Summary: Captain Swan au: Emma Swan and Killian Jones want nothing more than to forget their pasts and look to the future but when they cross paths as therapist and patient, at Storybrooke United Hospital, it stirs up trouble (and feelings they probably should ignore). Hiding their pasts might be a bit trickier than they had originally planned.


**I don't own these characters or some of the few things I took from Once Upon a Time as they belong to Adam and Eddy. By the way this is my first fanfic that I have ever written so reviews would be greatly appreciated. Thank you so much for reading and hope you enjoy!**

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><p>All Emma Swan wanted to do was forget the past. Ever since she was a little girl running from the system she wanted to be blissfully unaware of her situation. She wanted to forget her parents, or the lack thereof, she wanted to forget the scars that Neal made when he left her broken beyond repair, and right now she wanted to forget the fact that she had an appointment with her very first patient and she was late. Oh shit was she late and Regina was going to kill her. Not in the literal sense of course but being directed with one of Regina's signature glares made Emma feel even shameful for all the things she forgot to do when she was five. It must have been the whole Evil Queen complex that she had going for her. Entirely brutal but it must have worked in practice if she was one of the most sought after therapists on the Eastern Seaboard.<p>

Ah… therapy. If it didn't always come back to that. Emma was on her last leg to becoming an official clinical therapist. She had suffered through all the studying and even passed graduate school with flying colors, with the help of Mary Margaret, Ruby, and a couple glasses of wine here and there if she was being honest. Now though all she had to get through was the highly recommended internship by her old Professor Hopper, to work under Dr. Regina Mills at the Storybrooke Hospital. This internship was all anyone could talk about at the beginning of Graduate school.

She could remember the first day clearly. The way she walked in to that classroom beyond nervous and a little weary from the rumors she heard about her professor being a little too hands on. She had sat down at an unoccupied table near the back of the classroom to avoid conversation. Just as she was getting out a notebook and her favorite pen, so she would be ready to take notes when class started, a petite brunette with a kindly face sat down next to her. "Hi! I'm Mary Margaret!" she turned to her and said with a wide grin spread across her face.

"Emma."

Mary Margaret went on as if she didn't just hear the finality in Emma's tone. "It's very nice to meet you Emma. Oh my, are you ready for this grad class? Because I don't think I am. I heard it's really challenging but my sources tell me that Professor Hopper is one of the nicest teachers you can possibly get."

Emma could tell that Mary Margaret was trying really hard at conversation so she took pity on her and replied, "I'm as ready as I'll ever be."

Mary Margaret laughed at this, "You're so right but this class is the best way to get in the good graces of Dr. Mills and be chosen for her internship which is highly sought after at the end of the year."

The person who had sat on Emma's other side scoffed at this. He had dark hair and had an air of nobility, like he thought he was too good to be in their presence that lingered around him. "Yeah, good luck with that. It's all about connections and I have them so have fun with all your hope crap and what not."

"Bug off Hans", Mary Margaret said and turned to Emma with a smile, "I'm sure you'll do just fine Emma."

So much for not catching attention to herself but she appreciated the words from her nonetheless.

"Thank you. You too."

Mary Margaret would become a close friend and be one of the reasons why she ended up getting the internship that everyone wanted. Which was why she couldn't be late on her very first day.

"Shit shit shit." Emma muttered to herself as she ran across her apartment throwing on the clothes she, thanked god that she picked out the night before, on. She hastily threw on her favorite black pumps, grabbed her keys, and was out the door in what she deemed to be a world record of some kind.

One of the perks of moving to a small town was it only took her about ten minutes to arrive to her temporary workplace, Storybrooke United Hospital. She was choking down a bagel that she stopped by Granny's, the local and only café in town, to get as she barged through the doors of Regina's office. "Ah nice of you to finally show up Ms. Swan." Regina said rather offhandedly.

Emma noted that Regina looked polished and poised as usual. With her sleek black hair that fell perfectly to her shoulders, not a hair out of place. She wore a black jacket with a black pencil skirt and sky high heels that Emma thought could probably be used a weapon if she ever needed them to and the expression that she wore was nothing less than annoyed.

"I'm sorry. I woke up late and had to practically speed across town to get here on time." Emma replied breathless.

"I see that you had enough time to fit in a snack." Regina glanced at the last piece of Emma's bagel and then looked back up at her expectantly.

Emma balked. Who was this woman that could make her feel so small and childlike with just one glance. "I.. breakfast is the most important meal of the day." She said rather lamely.

Regina raised a perfectly manicured eyebrow at this "That it is. But as it seems, I do not have the time or patience to hear your morning sob story so let's get down to business. I'm assuming that's why you're here. Unless you want me to give away your spot to another, better qualified student who will take this internship seriously." She said this all in a cold methodical way that was honestly impressive to Emma more than anything.

"No! Of course I take this internship seriously! It was a silly mistake on my part and I promise it won't happen again," Emma frantically replied and then took a breath to compose herself and continued "I can guarantee you won't find anyone who will do this job better than me."

"That's what Dr. Hopper's recommendation more or less said but I guess I have yet to see this shining _savior_ he so gushed about." Regina said the word savior like it left a bad taste in her mouth. Emma winced and internally cursed her damn good for nothing alarm clock for making her late. What was the use of it if it didn't do its job!

Dr. Mills went on as if Emma's self-mortification wasn't clearly happening right before her eyes, "But as I was saying. Business. So I have lined you up with your first in practice patient today. You will meet the patient up in one of the therapy rooms on the fourth floor and have a 45 minute session. No more and no less. I don't really care how you handle your sessions, as therapy is handled differently by everyone. What works for one person might not work for another. The only thing that matters is that you get the job done and help the patient. Do you understand?"

Emma was taking this all in and she could practically feel her blood pressure rising by the second. "Yes ma'am. I understand." She said seriously.

"Wonderful. As you know, you will not be the only one talking to your patient. I will also be conducting sessions with them from time to time to see how you and your methods are faring so don't think you can get away with any funny business."

Emma didn't know what to think about that. Funny business? Why would she even consider funny business with a patient? She was a professional after all… well she was ALMOST a professional if she could make it through this internship. "Funny business?" she questioned confused.

"Yes funny business. I have seen some weird practices over my time but I can assure you that nothing good can come from the too personal approach. Some people might be able to tolerate it but I believe that doctor-patient relationships are unacceptable in a work place so might I suggest not using your womanly attributes as medicine to doctor your patients, Ms. Swan."

She thought she saw a flash of hurt in Regina's eyes but it was gone before she could even get a read on it so she chalked it up to her own imagination.

She leveled Regina with a professional expression and said without humor, "Trust me, I am the last person who would get themselves in that sort of sticky situation. I agree that it is wholly unprofessional."

Regina smirked as if she knew something that Emma didn't, "I thought you might say that and I'm glad we are on the same page but stranger things have happened."

Emma decided to let this comment slide with the shake of her head and to focus on the real issue: the identity of said patient. "Sooo, about my patient. When will I get their file?"

"Oh yes thank you for reminding me," she snapped her fingers and slid her chair over to the filing cabinet behind her and reached in and pulled out the thinnest profile she had ever seen. "Here is everything on him. His past, the reason why he is in here, his behaviors, etcetera." So it was a "he" that she would be dealing with. No wonder she got the third degree about doctor-patient professionalism.

"…this is all?" Emma said with a little apprehension.

"Yes, I mean you didn't honestly expect me to hand you a cookie cutter case did you?" She scoffed at this. "Surely you heard I wasn't that nice or generous."

Emma was surprised by her open attitude about her infamous reputation. She guessed if she was considered the "Evil Queen" by her coworkers she probably didn't give a damn what they thought in the first place and Emma respected that.

"Of course not. But even I know that that file is unusually small."

"Well as you will soon find out Ms. Swan your patient is a very mysterious and private person so we couldn't get that much on him. That is why it is your job to get the rest. Anyway I cannot waste one more minute here talking to you, so I assume you have half a brain and can figure out what to do from here without my coddling." Regina said condescendingly.

Emma was surprised that Regina even knew what coddling meant but she nodded her head in agreement to appease her.

"Alright well your session is in a half an hour so I recommend using that time to read your _unusually small _file and get prepared. I expect nothing less than excellence from the _savior_ herself." Regina was obviously out right mocking her and again she said the word savior like it was a nasty food she couldn't stomach.

With her head held high she started to leave and said, "Yes I know how to take it from here." Just as she thought she was about to step out the door to safety Regina called after her,

"Oh Ms. Swan before you take it from here, you might want to wash that cream cheese stain off your shirt from the most important meal of the day. Huh?"

Emma glanced down at her shirt and sure enough there was a small off white stain just barely visible but enough to make Emma's cheeks turn pink with embarrassment.

"That's all for now and please shut the door on your way out. Good day to you Ms. Swan." Regina had already turned back to her work as she said this. Giving no indication that she was aware if she didn't just undermine and humiliate Emma.

Emma closed her door with a bewildered expression. That Regina was a piece of work and it was obvious that she was not somebody to mess with. Evil Queen indeed. She let out a shaky breath and smoothed her hair and took off down the hall in search of a bathroom to wash off the bagel stain of shame before she saw her patient. It was going to be a hell of a long day and Emma was already wishing she was home with a glass of wine.

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><p>Twenty-five minutes later and Emma was anxiously sitting in Room 224A on the fourth floor waiting for her patient to arrive. It was a small square room with just the necessities, a chair for her, and a couch for him. Those along with her bag that held his file and a notebook to write down interesting things during the session were the only things that she needed. She was now anxiously tapping her pen on the notebook.<p>

She hated seeming over eager but after that slap in face from Regina she was more than ready to prove her competence. It had always been a problem for her, to prove herself. She realized from a young age that the only way to make people look at you with respect and treat you how you thought you deserved was to work your ass off and take your fate in your own hands. Emma believed that you got nowhere acting hurt and like a victim so she shoved Regina's insults out of her mind and set forth with the job in front of her. Which, after thorough examination of the miniscule file, was to help this Killian Jones sort out his problems. He was mysterious indeed. The only information she obtained from his file was that he was put in therapy against his will and that he was not happy about it which was made abundantly clear by the survey all patients were supposed to take as a sort of set point for how to start the therapy, where he had written at the bottom in the Comments section: BLOODY ROBIN AND HUMBERT MADE ME DO THIS.. THE ARSEHOLES. I AM FINE. Emma thought that was lovely, this just made her job all the more tricky but she was determined to impress Regina and do a good job.

Other than the bolded comment, nothing really set her off as unusual except for the reason why he was here was unclear. It puzzled her that a grown man would be put in to therapy against his will by friends, if she was assuming correctly by his use of "arsehole". That actually made her smile. She wondered who the hell still talked like that in the first place but she just took it that he was using the term for dramatic effect and he succeeded.

Time was moving slow for Emma. It seemed like the five minutes stretched out to hours and days but that was just her exaggerating and wanting to get this done and over with. Soon enough she heard a commotion down the hall that could only be Killian Jones.

"I just want it to be known Humbert that I am not doing this out of my own free will." He paused, Emma assumed for dramatic purposes and then continued. "That I account this as being equal to torture, something akin to waterboarding."

"Stop being such a drama queen Jones and get your ass in there. It's only 45 minutes, I don't think it will kill you. Hey it might help you grow a new set of balls since you obviously left yours at home." The other guy, Humbert said with humor in his voice.

"Oh bugger off I'm going." Killian said with exasperation.

"Call me if you need me to bring a towel to dry you off from all the waterboarding, Jones." Emma barely heard Humbert say with a chuckle as he walked off the way he came.

Finally there was a knock on the door. Emma yelled, "Come in." The door swung open and in came the man she assumed was Killian Jones. And hot damn was he a nice looking man even she wasn't too hard headed to take notice. With his raven black hair that fell in a perfectly messy wave on his forehead; his lean and muscular body that he covered with dark jeans, black V-neck t-shirt that revealed a curl of dark chest hair, and black leather jacket that fit him oh so well that it was almost sinful; and don't even get her started on those eyes. They were as blue and clear as the goddamn sea and had a trace of amusement in them if she was correct. Probably at how she was blatantly staring at him like he was a piece of meat.

He was smirking as he said, "You must be Dr. Swan and might I say they didn't tell me how incredibly lovely you would be."

Great he had an accent too, an Irish one that felt like velvet on her skin. This was just the cherry on top of her day.

She watched his eyes rake over her body very slowly and she tried to ignore the curling heat in her stomach that his gaze was causing her. She coughed and tried to gather her composure and professional air but his look piled on with the fact that her day was already going shitty made her seem bitchier than she intended as she snapped, "Yes and I see you finally find your balls to walk in here?" She was surprised at herself and a thought that Regina would have wished she would have thought of that.

He raised an eyebrow at that and guffawed. He was nearly breathless from laughter when he finally replied, "Gods they sure as hell didn't mention what a spit fire you are, love"

She was taken aback by his casual use of the term of endearment and didn't find it amusing. "I am not your love. I am your therapist so might I suggest that we get to why you're here and talk. Shall we?

"Sweetheart, I would pay to watch you talk all day. In fact I am so by all means proceed and don't be afraid to get a little rough. If you know what I mean." He said with a challenging look.

"Ha ha" Emma said drily "I see you use flattery and innuendos to offset your nervousness. Let me just write that down here." She returned his challenging look with a raise of her eyebrow.

"Y'know most people might take you attitude as off putting but I love a challenge." Killian put his hands behind his head as he reclined back on his couch giving off the air of ease but Emma could see past that and tell that he was tense. It was the slight quiver in his mouth and the set of his jaw that clued her in.

She had always been good at reading people. She had what her friends liked to coin a "super power", she just knew when somebody was telling the truth or just deflecting to avoid the real problems and Killian Jones was doing his best to seem cocky and flirtatious but it just wasn't going to fly with her.

She shot him a look that clearly stated she was done with his bullshit and said, "You can try to deflect all you want, Killian. But we both know that you were brought here for a reason so why don't we stop wasting our time by skirting around the issue and you tell me why."

The set in his jaw tightened, if only fractionally but she knew that she had him. He crossed his arms, a typical defensive pose. "Shouldn't you already know that?"

She clasped her hands together and looked at him expectantly, "I only know what the papers tell me so it's not a lot to go on. So I would like to know why you think you're here."

"I'm here because my friends and boss are nosey and don't know when to stay out of my bloody business."

"And what is your business?"

"What?"

"What I mean is why do you think that it's not their business?"

Emma watched him consider this with a purse of his lips. It was a minute before he replied.

"Let's put it this way, what if people, mainly your friends, started to assume the worst in you? How would you feel? Not too happy I can bet." He let the t pop a bit and it just hung in the air.

"Why do you think I wouldn't be happy?" She was taken aback by his blatant insinuation about her and even more so that he seemed so sure with his answer. Almost like he knew her but he couldn't he had just met her.

"I can see it in your eyes Swan. I would bet my life that you are just as closed off as me honestly I bet you are even more closed off than I am." Again he said it so matter of fact, like it was just something that he knew off the top of his head like knowing the capitals to the 50 states.

"You don't know me. This isn't my session, this is yours. Stop deflecting." And even to her own ears she sounded a bit defensive.

He smirked like she had told him he was right and said with a wave of his hands "Like I said it's my business. Why? Well I'm a grown man and I am able to take care of myself. Wouldn't you agree?" At that he gave her a knowing look that spoke volumes and she heard him loud and clear. He was saying that they were alike. They stared each other down waiting to see who would break first.

Emma did as she looked at the clock behind Killian's head. The phrase saved by the bell had never been so relevant.

"It looks like our time is up." She said as she shuffled some papers and looked down to put them in her bag. She went to stand up and head towards the door but Killian had already beat her there and was waiting expectantly.

Emma put out her hand for him to shake but instead he grabbed it and pulled it to his lips and barely ghosted them over her knuckles. Emma wasn't daft enough to ignore the shiver and jolt of electricity that went through her at his touch.

Killian looked down at her through his lashes as he said, "It was nice to meet you Swan."

She knew that he was just trying to get a reaction out of her and it pissed her off even more that it was working so she did what she did best and completely ignored it.

She ripped her hand of his grip as if he had burned her, and really he sort of did, and did her best impression of Regina that she could muster and said, "Tomorrow at 3:45, Jones. Make sure your balls don't make you late next time." She stepped around him and with her head held high walked out the door. The last thing she heard from him really struck a chord but she pretended to ignore him.

"Oh Swan, now who is the one who needs the talk therapy here?" he called out after her with a chuckle.

She shouldn't have been surprised that he hit right on the dot with this as well. I mean he had been right about his insinuations of her so far and that threw her off balance more than anything. Screw the one glass of wine, she needed the whole damn bottle after this day.

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><p><strong>please review and help a sister out! thank you!<strong>


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